


The Chance to Hold You

by luminousbluebells



Category: Miss Fisher and the Crypt of Tears (2020), Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon Compliant, Crying Jack Robinson, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt Jack Robinson, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Miss Fisher and the Crypt of Tears
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:49:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27925546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luminousbluebells/pseuds/luminousbluebells
Summary: Jack opens up early in the morning after his first night with Phryne in the desert.
Relationships: Phryne Fisher/Jack Robinson
Comments: 7
Kudos: 73





	The Chance to Hold You

Phryne awoke in the early hours of the morning, pleasantly warm with the feeling of Jack’s body close to hers. She turned sleepily to face him and found that he was awake as well—he leaned his head on his hand and rested his elbow on the mattress. A soft smile bloomed on Phryne’s face as she recalled the night before, and she was about to shift closer to kiss him when the sleep in her eyes cleared and she saw the tears running down his face.

She startled and propped herself up. “Jack?”

He turned away quickly, moving to sit on the edge of the bed and reaching up to wipe his face roughly.

“Jack,” she insisted. “Are you all right?”

“Yes,” he replied gruffly. He cleared his throat and sucked in a big breath of air. “Yes, I’m fine.”

After a moment’s hesitation, Phryne decided to push it. “Well, you don’t look fine,” she said softly. He ran his hands over his thighs, a habit she’d noticed long ago as a surefire indicator of his discomfort. “Do you… want to tell me about it?”

Jack looked down. “No, I—” he started. Phryne wished she could see his face. “I… I don’t think you’d want to hear it,” he finished quietly. 

That stung. She knew she’d been… less than caring, and more than a little difficult, in the past, but it truly pained her that Jack felt she would not want to hear whatever it was that had brought him to tears.

“Jack,” Phryne whispered. She got up enough to reach out and turn his face towards her. She wiped another tear away with her thumb as it trailed down his cheek. After a moment, he met her eyes. “Tell me?” she requested softly.

Jack took a deep, shuddering breath and shifted to sit cross-legged facing Phryne. His brow furrowed and he bit his lip to stop his chin from trembling. He closed his eyes for a moment, gathering himself before looking at her again.

“I thought… I would never get the chance to hold you,” he said, voice breaking a bit. “That I would never see you again.”

_Oh._

Phryne’s heart squeezed and she reached out to place her hand gently over his. Jack bowed his head and stared down at their hands as he continued.

“And-and I know—that you _are_ here and I _can_ … and it’s unreasonable for me to…” he mumbled, trailing off. Phryne waited patiently, listening. The only other time she’d seen him this flustered was that ill-fated night when she’d been delayed and he’d found her father’s cravat on her parlor table.

“Never mind. It’s… I won’t disturb you with talk of it anymore,” Jack said quickly, starting to turn away again. 

“Jack Robinson!” she exclaimed.

He was taken aback by her sudden outburst. She continued. “You… _confounding,_ wonderful man. You are perfectly reasonable to have been affected, and distressed—I have been utterly insufferable and insensitive, because, as you so accurately pointed out last night, I _am_ afraid of you—of the... depth… of your feelings for me. I acted too carelessly—especially when we spoke at my memorial service. And I am so sincerely sorry that I gave you the impression that I do not want to hear about the things that have caused you pain. I _do_ care, Jack. I _do_ want you to tell me about them, even if— _especially_ if they were my doing.”

Jack looked up at her and nodded jerkily, tears brimming from his red-rimmed eyes. Shame filled Phryne—she had really put him through the ringer. His pain was her doing. She reached out to him, pulling him closer to her, and they laid back down facing one another. Phryne caressed Jack’s hand in her own, watching as he chose his words.

“I couldn’t sleep, all that time. This was the best I’ve slept in months,” he admitted tearfully. “Years, maybe.”

Phryne was tempted to diminish her own discomfort by making a joke about how well he’ll sleep on a proper bed once they reach a hotel, but she knew Jack (oh, how well she knew him) and recognized that he was being more vulnerable with her than he was usually comfortable with too. She owed it to him to be serious and march on.

“Nightmares?” she asked. They’d shared some of them with each other before. 

“Yes,” he whispered. He traced her hand with his fingertip. “And grief.”

Her heart grew heavier with every cripplingly honest word that came out of his mouth. She took a deep breath and gently closed her eyes for a moment. “I don’t think I will ever be able to apologize enough for putting you through that, Jack.”

He raised her hand to his mouth and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. 

“It was Dr. Macmillan who forced me to continue. I... I was in quite the state the first time she came round. A few days after I’d heard the news.”

Phryne smiled a little. “I must thank her properly for taking care of you when we get back to Melbourne.” Her best friend really was a gem. 

Jack’s face held a hint of a smile too, but sadness still pervaded his features. “She convinced me to go to London for the memorial. And I sent her a telegram straight afterwards.”

“Ah, so it was _you_ who told her! I’d wondered how she’d gotten the news so much faster than the rest.”

“I can only imagine the colorful language she graced you with in her response,” he smirked.

“Well, colorful is one word for it,” she joked. “But I deserved it.”

Jack didn’t protest, and she was glad for it. After a quiet moment, he reached up hesitantly to stroke her jawline gently with the backs of his fingers. “I am terrified that this is all some elaborate dream, and soon I’ll wake up and have to face the world without you again.”

Phryne drew him towards herself. His face nestled into the side of her neck, she stroked his hair. “I promise you," she breathed, "this is real.”


End file.
